Hi, I am currently working on several rather big projects that are hopefully coming to fruition sooner rather than later! In the meantime I have been semi-regularly updating my patreon page with some interesting shorter essays. If you like what I write and would like some more, as well as support me financially in the process, please consider taking a look!
Author: SamRandom
Essay: the mushroom and the soil
Today’s essay partly comes around thanks to a wonderful series of video essays, exhibitions and talks hosted on the Serpentine museums official youtube site. Many of the speakers helped me to open my eyes to what soil can be and what it means to us as humans and living creatures.
In this text I would like to share with my readers my love for all forms of fungal life. More specifically will I try to sell you on the wonder of soil dwelling fungi! These forms of life, for those that are not aware of it, do not fall within the animal or plant kingdom. But rather form their third kingdom, that of the micilia, here we find mushrooms, molds, lichens and until recently, slime molds.
The kingdom of micilia is a deeply fascinating one, and one that still holds many mysteries, we so far only know of, and have been able to to catalog a very small percentage of the worlds fungi, lichen and molds. These species are highly adapted and adaptable to the areas in which they inhabit. From the symbiosis between fungi and algae found in the lichen to the rapidly growing single cell organisms of the microfungi, is it truly a varied and complex world of wonder and mystery!
These various kinds of life forms are, while looking a lot like plants, indeed a lot more closely related to the animal kingdom. For one is the micilia not made out of plant fibers, but rather microscopic chitin, the same materials that crustaceans and many insects form their outer shells from. Furthermore, these lifeforms do not perform any form of photosynthesis, instead extracting nutrition from the surrounding areas by sending out acids much in the same way that our stomachs do to ingest nutrition. In this way many fungi and other mycelia have an incredibly important role to play in the decomposition and reuptake of dead organic material, be that animal or plant life.
This essay in particular will focus on the many kinds of micilia, that is the large networks of string-like structures found underground, as well as microfungi, and their impact on soil health. I will begin by defining what I mean with soil, and how it is different from dirt. Dirt in the most simple terms is the combination of clay, organic matter, stones and sand. What makes soil different from dirt, scientifically, is that soil is teeming with life. Soil teems with fungi, insects and thousands of different forms of microbial life, all which does its part to turn dead organic material into nutrition for the plants that grow upon it.
As mentioned before, fungi work to decompose and pick up nutrition from many of the dead organic material found in and on the grounds, from animals to dead flowers and fallen branches. They do this by the spreading of their micilian networks. This not only keeps the ground clear, but also makes sure the minerals and other nutrients found within can be reused by the rest of the ecosystem. Recent science has taught us that these micilian networks are capable of seeking out nearby dead biomatter to feast upon, and will to a much greater extent move in that direction.
Even more so, it is not uncommon for fungi of our forests to create symbiotic relationships with trees, flowers and other plants. In return for sharing some of the nutrition of the decomposition in return for sugar from the plants photosynthesis. Furthermore, it has been shown that the mycelial networks of many fungi have managed to connect several species of trees and other vegetation together, and created a form of communication network between them, sharing nutrition as well as electrical signals, this wondrous discovery will be the topic of a future essay!
While you might rarely see a mushroom body as you wander the woods, know that the soil living fungi is always there, just underneath the surface, and their presence is vital to ours, and every other living organisms existence. Sadly these complex organisms and their relationships to other lives are being disturbed by deforestation, acidification and most of all monoculture farming. Thankfully things are changing, and many interesting projects of so-called permaculture are starting to flourish across the globe, something I would love to return to another day. For now, know that the fungi is everywhere, even if you can’t see it.
Further reading:
https://www.youtube.com/@SerpentineGalleriesUK
Stamets (2019) Fantastic Fungi, ISBN 9781647221720
Essey: Alcohol and the self: A study in drug use and self perception
Trigger warnings:
Alcoholism, mentions of abuse and implied assault.
Disclaimer:
I want to begin with a series of disclaimers. First and foremost, I must make it clear that I myself do not drink alcohol and have not been truly drunk even once in my life. However, I, like most people, have had experiences with seeing both the positive and negative effects of the use of alcohol. Furthermore, I want to also clarify from the start that I will denote alcohol as a drug in this text as this decision to do so is vital for the point of this essay. The purpose of this text is to discuss and elaborate upon the discussion and culture of perceived alcohol use within a Swedish context.
Introduction
I am not a drinker. I have been drunk once or twice but I just never got into drinking myself. As someone who does not use alcohol, I have had countless discussions of why I chose not to partake in this socially acceptable and expected drug. This text is meant to be an exploration of these discussions, and why they so often turned sour or hostile.
It has dawned on me more and more that these discussions were never about me and my abstinence, but rather what that abstinence does with the narratives around alcohol and drinking. Alcohol use is common in Sweden- about three out of four adults consume alcohol (The Public Health Agency of Sweden, 2022). Although the dangerous consumption of alcohol is decreasing, between 16 and 30 percent of Swedish adults, depending on which study you refer to, still claimed that they had consumed unhealthy amounts of alcohol. Despite these concerning numbers, the topic of alcohol abuse is not something that is often discussed, and when it is indeed raised, it is often framed in a negative light, decrying those that have fallen to this so-called vice. Documentaries, tv series and commercials often depict those who are afflicted by alcoholism as being failures of sorts; that it is due to their personal failings and choices that they find themselves where they are.
Shame and normalcy
I will begin with unpacking two concepts that will be integral to my discussion. The first of which being the notion of shame. I will use shame here in the context of doing something that you have an ethical, emotional or social aversion towards doing something. This shame can be internally motivated (i.e. the action can go against something that you believe or feel). It can also be externally motivated from actual or perceived expectations of wider society the subject exists within.
Alcohol seems to be uniquely positioned in Swedish and western society as a bridge between what is and what is not considered shameful behavior in my experience. The trope of the drunk ex sending embarrassing texts, unwise plans made while inebriated, drunken fights and unfortunate drunken hookups are commonplace in media, especially in romantic comedies. Doing dumb things under the influence of alcohol is almost expected, and in some ways, welcomed. With that said, these actions are simultaneously tied with the shame that comes with the confrontations that will inevitably occur once the effects of alcohol have worn off.
This leads us to the next term- normality, or normalization. As mentioned in the introduction, alcohol is an almost universal part of most Swedish citizens’ lives. Over eighty percent of adult Swedish citizens have used alcohol at least once within a year, according to the Swedish health department’s latest report. This trend seems to be changing, partly due to influences of other cultures, but it’s also due to a change in the outlook of alcohol by younger generations. The same study shows that comparatively, older Swedes take up a larger percentage of alcohol consumers, and the notion that ‘alcohol is dangerous’ is much more prevalent amongst younger individuals. (The Public Health Agency of Sweden, 2022)
The ambiguity of the use of alcohol makes it hard to look at in the same light as tobacco or cannabis use for example. Alcohol is, and has been for most of its history, a part of Swedes’ daily lives. As mentioned before, the shame and difficult situations that arise from the use of these drugs are not only seen as normal, but often quite comical. This can sometimes make the shameful and painful parts of alcohol use difficult to express earnestly in day to day conversations.
Pain and addiction
Much of the discussions around alcohol that I have been a part of, inevitably comes back to two topics- addiction and pain. The first topic, addiction is something that many that I have spoken with about alcohol have had, or at the very least, have had second hand experiences with. Alcohol is after all, an addictive substance, and is the only truly psychoactive drug that is both socially accepted and juridically legal. (The Public Health Agency of Sweden, 2022)
Alcoholism is also often hidden in plain sight in Sweden. We can all see the cues to the alcohol store when it opens, hear about tales of binge drinkers and on and off alcoholics, but like so much else, it is easily ignored because, once again it is both normal and shameful. The prevalence of individuals who suffer from alcohol makes it unfortunately easier for others to ignore it, as well as to see their suffering as normal or expected. Very much like as it is with homelessness, does an alcoholic also represent what would happen if an individual would fail to meet social expectations. To become addicted to alcohol -to fall from grace so to speak- is often depicted as a personal failure. This shame of becoming the other, of becoming someone that has failed, also makes it harder for most people to empathize or even acknowledge those who suffer from alcoholism. To do so would be to acknowledge the risks in their own behaviors and choices.
The effects of alcohol can sometimes lead to dangerous behaviors and poor decision making skills. Accidents due to loss of motor skills, lack of self awareness and a heightened sense of invulnerability are all well attested effects of the drug. These injuries or other pain caused under the influences can often be easily laughed off by the surrounding population, and is once again, somewhat normalized and accepted. This normalization makes it harder to verbalize and discuss openly what happened during said painful events. This may lead to more internalized regret and shame over the individual’s actions. This, tied with the addictive nature of the drug, can easily lead to a spiral of dependency and disgust of the substance. (Pietrangelo, 2023)
Alcohol affects different people differently, while some gets solemn and quiet, others gets loud and boisterous, and others get angry and violent. Many have each of these reactions at different times. When violence and anger shows up, it is not uncommon for those closest to the intoxicated to be the one that suffers the most. This, like many other negative effects of alcohol use, is something that everyone at least has a third hand account of. Many I have spoken to have tales of someone who has suffered at the hands of someone with alcohol dependency, or simply with especially aggressive or violent reactions to alcohol. The shame is present here as well, both in the shame of the perpetrator and their victims. I want to be very careful with my claims here, as I have not been personally affected by this form of tragedy, nor do I have expert knowledge in the subject. I, like many others, have second or third hand experiences, as well as experiences of ingesting several media presentations of alcohol and violence. (Pietrangelo, 2023) I will end my discussion of this particular topic here as a result, as it is such a big subject that there is no way I can even begin to do it justice in this short essay on my personal experiences.
Alcohol and the self
I would argue that very few people initially see themselves as an addict, and often need help from others to see this. The argument often goes like this, “alcoholism, abuse and other destructive behaviors are something that happens to others, not me”. Among the people I have spoken to regarding their alcohol use, all of them are clear that they are more or less in control of their alcohol consumption. This is not to say that the people I talked to were wrong or lying. It is simply a trend I have noticed.
I will once again tread very carefully here, for I have very little experience in talking to individuals that have been, or currently are clinically addicted to alcohol. What has become apparent, if the rest of my conclusions are to be believed, is that to be an addict, is to become an other, in the eyes of those around you.
The self and other as non drinker
There are several tropes I have encountered regarding the non-drinker in Sweden. Non-drinkers are often seen as prudes, being boring, not fitting in or wanting to just make a point. Many of these negative tropes I would argue, can be linked to shame and normalcy that we have discussed earlier. Seeing how normalized the use of alcohol is, it is not surprising that one would be seen as somewhat of an outsider for not drinking. Seeing someone not drinking would also confront someone who drinks with several of the concepts discussed earlier. The self image of the non drinker, is in all intent and purpose unimportant to the text.
Conclusions
This text has not meant to present a complete image on how alcohol culture looks in Sweden, or how this pertains to Swedish society in general. I aim to share some of my personal experiences with alcohol as alcohol discourse as someone that doesn’t personally drink. I likewise would like to air some of my grievances I have had with said discourse, and try and formulate them in text.
In this text I have tried to argue that by normalizing the use of alcohol, it makes it hard to criticize the use of the drug without criticizing the users of the drug. This may lead to individuals finding it hard to express their feelings on things that have happened regarding their use, or others use of alcohol. I do not wish to demonize alcohol or alcohol use as completely evil, but simply to try and open up and change how we discuss alcohol, both its good and bad sides.
Note that I have not discussed the more positive aspects of alcohol, both as a drug, and as a social construct, this is simply due to the fact that I believe such a topic deserves its own chapter, as it is way too complex and nuanced to fit in here.
The Public Health Agency of Sweden. (2022.). https://www.folkhalsomyndigheten.se/the-public-health-agency-of-sweden/living-conditions-and-lifestyle/andtg/alcohol/
Pietrangelo, A. (2023). What Are the Effects of Alcohol on the Body? Healthline. https://www.healthline.com/health/alcohol/effects-on-body#physical
Media literacy 101, part 4: The voice of the narrator
In the previous chapter, I discussed the role of the antagonist and protagonist within most narratives, and how understanding these roles can help us understand a text as a whole. Just like the point of view of these leading characters, can the point of view of the narrator also tell the reader a lot about the narrative as a whole. There are several types of narrators, a few of which I will go over in this blog post.
By discerning the voice of the narrator, can we parse more about the tone, theme and mood that the text is going for. A serious novel usually has an omnipresent, implied narrator, while a comedic novel might choose a more overtly present narrator that is able to discuss and comment on the plot of the text itself. Contemplating how these narrator voices are used and in which context, can also help you become a better writer yourself.
First, second and third person narrations
The first definition I will discuss is that of point of view. The point of view in this context refers to which kind of perspective we are getting from the narrator. First, and third person are the most common forms of narrative styles, but other narrative points of view, like second person does occur, if a lot less often.
In a first person narrative, is the tale told from one or several people, ei “I walked down the road”. The narrator and the protagonist of the narrative are the one and the same person. Travel journeys, horror stories and other narratives where the internal monologues and feelings of the main character are important often use the first person form of narration.
The second person narrative refers to the reader themself as the point of view character. In other words the narrator is addressing a “you” in the text, for example “you find yourself in a dark hallway”. This is not a very often used perspective, but one that can be effectively used in horror. It is mostly used in choosing your own adventure novels and visual novels and other kinds of interactive fiction.
Third person narrative refers to a narration where the explicit or implicit narrator is telling a story about someone else, more about this in a bit. Most modern fiction is told this way, where a narrating voice describes the narrative of one or more protagonists. For example “Tom walked through the door, he felt a rush of fresh air”.
In deciding which perspective to set the narratives, do you also in part decide what kind of relationship the reader will have to the characters in your text.
Reliable and unreliable, explicit and implicit, omnipresent or not.
The voice of the narrator is a strong tool in storytelling, and can tell the reader a lot about a text. Besides setting the narration in first, second or third person, can the writer also put different kinds of levels of involvement that the narrator has in the story, as well as how real they are within the narrative itself.
First let’s discuss how or if the narrator exists within the fiction itself. An implicit narrator often only exists as a tool to tell the narrative, and only the text itself implies its existence. They exist soely as a medium for the telling of the tale, the words themselves. It is also possible to view the implicit narrator as the voice of the author itself.
An explicit narrator exists as a character in the tale itself. One example is Dr Watson in Sherlock Holmes, where the books are supposed to be Watsons own notes and journals. The explicit author can have an active role in the tale or not. A first person narration always has an explicit narrator in the form of the character telling the story.
A narrator can be omnipresent, or only be able to present a certain point of view of a narrative. An omnipresent narrator is present everywhere, and can be used to tell a story from every single angle, as needed. Third person narratives are often presented as omnipresent, in order for the author to jump between settings and points of view. An omnipresent narrator is useful to tell a full story of many points of view. A first person narrator is by its very nature confined to the character that is telling the story, and as a result can only tell the things that this point of view character is purview to. It is common that a narrator only follows a few or only one character, and can as a result only present a narrative from their points of view in the narrative. This is an easy tool to create suspense and mystery, as the reader is only previewed to the information that these characters have.
Lastly is the question of the reliable vs the unreliable narrator. These terms relate to how trustworthy the narrator of a text is. Most narrators, especially those told in third person narration are to be viewed as reliable narrators. In short, are these narrators that can be trusted to tell a tale as it supposedly happened. Just as with being omnipresent, are implied narrators also reliable by their nature of nonexistent. Most modern novels you would read follow this trend, unless adding an unreliable narrator would make the tale more compelling or interesting. With a reliable narrator can you assume that the things it is telling is true.
An unreliable narrator on the other hand is a narrating voice that you can not trust to tell a tale truthfully. Or rather, contradictions and falsehoods are baked into the storytelling style, making it harder to discern what happened within the context of the story. First person narrators are unreliable narrators due to their highly subjective point of view. For example, many of Lovecrofts main characters are highly unreliable narrators, as many of them are at the brink of insanity and despair. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Hunter, S Thompson is a great example of both a first person narrative, Hunter himself, and an unreliable narrator, due to the melding of time and space that comes from both the surreal location of Las Vegas and the many psychedelic drugs the main character uses during the story.
An unreliable narrator is great to create a sense of confusion and fear in the reader, as well as a heightened sense of suspense. After all, who can we trust, if we can’t even trust the one telling the story to us.
Final thoughts
I have in this text, tried to present a series of narrative points of view and discuss a few ways they are often used. These definitions are far from the only ways to break down the voice of the narrator, but they are ones that I have found useful myself.
By dissecting how and why a narrator is presented in a text in a certain way, can the reader dive deeper into the message and theme of the text. It is worth putting some extra time in choosing what kind of narration that fits your story the best. While the omnipresent, implicit and reliable narrator is one that most know, and use, playing around with the voice of your narrator really changes the perspective on your writing, and your stories.
Essey: mellodifestivalen, a tale of big egos and low expectations
Melodifestivalen is the Swedish regional part of the eurovision song contest. Here is where Sweden’s representation is chosen in a several week long media spectacle. Seeing how this is the Swedish broadcast networks (SVT) biggest crowd pusher of the year, it is no surprise that the company wants to get as much out of it as possible. This can be most easily seen by the extension of the contest that has happened over the many years of its run.
Melodifestivalen is one of, if not The must see television show on Swedish TV. This can come from genuine enjoyment, scorn, an unwillingness to miss out, or a combination of all the above. In this essay I will use the series as a way to deconstruct two major themes that can be found in many of SVTs productions. One being that of a sense of ego and inflated importance, as well as a sense of entitlement to lowered standards. There is this air of SVT productions that are expected to be measured with a lower standard because they are “just public television”. I will in this essay aim to discuss how these two modes of thinking often contradict each other.
Low standard and the sense of being “just SVT” is something that is easy to spot in the production of Melodifestivalen. Despite being played in a grand arena, having a grand budget, almond raking in millions of views, is it always a sense of amateurish feeling over the production and script writing of the show itself. The jokes are corny and not very well thought out, the presenters give off the feeling of uncomfortable convention hosts. Many of the jokes that are pulled from this real or perceived amateurishness, like the ironic use of comic sans, or the fact that a joke did not land, being the punchline to the joke more often than not.
This is not an opinion I am alone with, and as I have alluded to, are there many that watch the show to groan at the bad jokes and corny performances, as well as the often sadly misguided musical performances. This is a fact that SVT is well aware of, and has on more than one occasion made light of in their comedy often at the expense of their detractors.
A good example of this is the year that SVT used muppets to present their different viewers and their reason to watch. One pair of these puppets being an elderly, upper class and intellectual couple that watched the show seemingly in pure duress, and spent the entire show berating and degrading it. This would have been a fine thing to do, even though the Muppets did it first and better with the peanut gallery, if it wasn’t for the fact that the old couple that “just didn’t get it”, were always right!
This attitude of casually dismissing criticism as overly intellectual snobs is something that can be found in other productions then just Melodifestivalen. Many of their shows like Uti Bugda and similar comedy show as a distinct lowbrow, and yet mean spirited tone towards their perceived audience. This is furthermore followed by yet again a notion that any low production values or bad quality from their part should be forgiven due to their state of public television, and as a result, not as fancy as commercial television.
SVT was, for a long time the only television that was available for the Swedish population, as the first and only tv channel made in, and for Sweden. They were from the beginning, and still are fully funded by Swedish tax money, and operate, at least in theory, fully free from both government and commercial interest. SVT is considered to be a public service, much like the BBC in the UK, and as a result is meant to work in service of the public. This project involves trying to cater to as wide an audience as possible, and to make sure to give something for everyone, or in other words, for the general public. This runs the gambit from low brow comedy shows, to high concept discussion shows on art, faith and science. In later years has this responsibility been spread over several channels where SVT 1 remained the most focused towards, in lack of a better word, mass audiences, where SVT2, Knowledge channel, and the SVT kids taking over many of the more specialized roles. It is not perhaps surprising that Melodifestivalen is hosted only at SVT 1. This sense of being in the service to the public, as well as being the first TV channel available has, I would argue, led to an elevated sense of importance amongst the executives of SVT.
SVT today does not exist alone. And for decades they have now had to contend with the competition of other, nonprofit and for profit TV stations and conglomerates, and it is in this relationship that both of their self images can be found and understood. On one end does SVT tout their role as, free (in a way) entertainment, education and culture for the public. That they serve a higher purpose than the commercial TV stations as their role as public services. On the other hand does it also seem to exist a certain defensiveness in SVTs many shows about, not being able to, and in fact, that they should not be expected to be as good as the big commercial stations with their enormous budgets and talent pools.
Nowhere else I would argue, is this dichotomy more apparent, then in the case of Melodifestivalen. There is a grand sense of being the People’s entertainment festival, and there is indeed in theory possible for anyone to join and possibly win the entire contest. There is a sense that SVT is almost doing the nation a service by providing the Swedish people of something to gather around, be proud of, and more importantly then all, to take part in, And yes, here I have to give credit where credit is due, as Melodifestivalen does rake in thousands of dollars for charity every year. At the same time the show is mired with flat comedy, self referential and erogatory comedy and an overall sense of, Don’t bully us, we are just the silly show Melodifestivalen.
This contrast is what, in my opinion, makes Melodifestivalen uniquely frustrating to watch, and I have to admit, I do still watch it every year.
Essay: Mental health in roleplaying games, a case study
Vampire the Masquerade and Elder scrolls, playing the mad
The depiction of mental health in fiction has had a long and dark history. Often has mental health been used as a mark of otherness, evil or as comic relief. Maniac killers, sadistic monsters or babbling clowns are often seen in popular media for the last hundred years. Today I will discuss another form of madness in fiction, one that has a long history in many cultures around the world, madness as inspiration.
Setting the stage
The image of the mad or deranged seer is not a new archetype by any sense of the word. Many examples can be found within Greek and Roman mythology, Cassandra the seer being one of the more famous examples of this. A woman with absolute clairvoyance, but cursed to be seen as mad or as a liar by all that hears her. These examples are indeed the basis for my first example, the Malkavian clan of vampires in Vampire the Masquerade. Being that the setting is deeply rooted in Abrahamic traditions, it is not surprising that Roman and Greek tales and fables would be integral to the setting, considering their importance the development of christianity.
The Malkavians are depicted to be blessed, or cursed with a form of sight, to be able to see into the future, past, as well as the realities behind their own. They are furthermore cursed, or gifted by one or several forms of mental illness or neurodivergence. The willing or unwilling followers of Sheagorath is likewise both cursed and blessed. As most if not all of them are artisticly or intelectually talanted in some form or another. While this is not always the case, there is more often then not a tie between artistic and intelectual prowers, and madness. It seems that seeking to deeply or to greedily in to the secrets of the world of Elder scrolls is a sure way to have your mind warped in some way.
The family of the mad and the free
Each bloodline of the vampires, think of them has heradatary lines from one generation to another, has a founder or original creator. In the case of the Malkavian, this original creator was known as Malkov. A seer and wiseman that said to have drunk to deeply from the veins of his master, and gleemed secrets no mortal should witness.
With this wisdom came visions, visions of the future, and the past. This made him feared, and loathed by his simplings and fellow vampires. Their ire grew so large, that one day he was dismembered, and like the god Osiris, burried in seperete points of the earth. But, unlike Osiris, he was never put toghter, he was never saved, but insted left to suffer and rage in his many prisions, for a man of such great power and evil, is not so easily destroyed. Instead of making his body whole, instead his influense spread just as far as his mortal form now had. By infiltrating and connecting all the minds of his children, he was able to be everywhere, and nowhere at once. This connection to Malkov, and between his children is known as the madness network.
The Malkavian vampires of the modern setting of Vampire the masqauarade is directly or indirectly tied in to the madness network, and can use it, concsly or unconcisly to pull forth emoptions, memories and knowlage of other members of the Clan Malkavian. This trade is far from safe tough, and it easy to catch more then you asked for when diving in to the subconcious of hundreds of undead individuals. The madness network is not called for no reason, and each individual inflicted with Malkavian vampyrism is in one way or another afflicted with some sort of mental divergence, or have their old once enhancesd or even replaced. Madness is in the case of the Malkavians directly tied fo the concept of forbidden or esoteric knowlage, and the Malkavians are indeed able to see beyond the mundane dimentions of even the supernatural realms of vampires and ghosts, in to the beyond. So strong is this power that they can even change the very fabric of the world around them, foming it more to fit their own view of how things truly are.
This connection was not always present with the Malkavians, and there was a time that they tried, in an attempt to blend better in with their vampire brethren of the Camarilla they gave up, or at least stemmed some of their more outlandish powers, and they hoped, their neourises. The Camarilla is an organization that thrives on normalcy, tradition and hiding in plain sight, all things that the Malkavians had a dificulty to follow. Unlike their chaotic brothers in the Sabbat, that fully embraced their curse, did the Camarilla Malkavians for a time manage to stem their affliciton, at least outwordily. The act of “blending in” or “acting normal” is one that I am sure that many of my fellow neurodivergent readers recognise. And it was just an act for the Malkavians, an act mostly for themselves, and despite the fact that they had sucesfully cut themselves of from their more strange and disturbing powers, were the same, strangeness or otherness still there, just muted or repressed. The real life allegories here are not hard to spot, and the extremes of either repression or fully embracing once otherness is not uncommon in the real life. I to have been forced to learn certain social codes or behaviours to fit in, or hide my angsiety or obsessive tought patterns to others. and I known many others that have been forced to do the same.
This mask did not hold for long, and the madness of Malkov is back in full force in the modern Malkavian, if not even stranger. Their Sabbat brethren, due to their brutal and cruel ways have intertwined even deeeper in to the Malkavian madness network, to the point where they more resemple collection of hiveminds then individuals.
The real life allegories here are not hard to spot, and the extremes of either repression or fully embracing once otherness is not uncommon in the real life. I to have been forced to learn certain social codes or behaviours to fit in, or hide my angsiety or obsessive tought patterns to others. and I known many others that have been forced to do the same. Likewise is the Sabbat Malkavians an example of how destructive and manipulative social structures can make such mental ilnesses and divergences even worse, and in some cases lead to co-dependenices.
One of the more striking features of playing a Malkavinan is that you can not choose, not to be “mad” in some form or another. Every player can choose to have have negative traits, one of them being what the game calls Derangements, but a Malkavian can not choose, they Have to take at least one of these derangement. The Malkavian is in other words forced in to the roll of a form of other via the mental divergence of their blood. This divergence also comes with higntened senses, intuison or artisitc abilities they did not have as a mortal. This consept does make the Malkavians very dificult to play, and even more dificult to play well, as it is easy to fall in to clyshes or turn your character in to a comedic parody. Thankfully the player handbook does a good job of introducing the players that may not have had a personal experience of mental divergence, and sheperds them trough the process of seeing the world trough another view. For as the proverb goes, “the mirror is cracked, but surprisingly clear”.
To become madness, and to witness the mad
Elder scrolls take a different route when it comes to its relationship to madness, as it is often represented by a god, in the form of Sheogorath, the god of madness but also the patron of poets, artists and intellectuals to some extent. Sheogorath himself is shown to be arbitrary, petty and childish, but also frighteningly intelligent and quick witted. He often plays an antagonistic role, and seems to take great pleasure in humbling the proud and arrogant, a trait he also shares with the Malkavians.
In this chapter I will focus on the expansion adventure to Elder Scrolls Oblivion called The Shivering Isles, where the player not only aims to save the realm of the mad god, but eventually to become the mad god themselves. Through this adventure the player is confronted with many facets of what the game calls madness, primarily divided into Mania, the land of excess, euphoria and mania, and dementia, representing depression, paranoia and dysphoria. The tale is filled with subtle and not so subtle references to mental health, medication as well as creativity and obsessive creation.
The leader of Dementia is a cruel woman driven by her paranoia that makes her jump at every shadow, and see evil and ruin everywhere. The leader of Mania is on the other hand a man addicted to powerful drugs that helps with his manic depressive moods. While many of the examples of madness are written off as a joke, are there some genuinely interesting or tragic characters in the Isles. One example is a man in Dementia that wishes you to kill him, as committing suicide would lead him to have to endure great torments from the land itself, as Sheagoorath himself has instructed. If you agree to help this man, you will gain access to his house, where you find his journal as well as a Ring of happiness. Here the man describes how he has dissociative episodes, and suffers from grave depression. He later describes how a mage nade him the ring of happiness, and while it did make him feel less empty and hollow, it also made him feel less of himself, numb and strange, as a result he stopped wearing it. This is a clear allegory to antidepressants, and how it is not uncommon for individuals to feel that something of themselves is lost in the use of them.
What makes this take on madness so different then the Malkavian example, is the fact that the player, from the very start is told that, You do not belong. Your character is not seen as one of the true citizens of the isles, and is as a result coded as, for the lack of a better word, sane. Note that you are, as a player, still put in the role of an outsider, but for very different reasons. Instead of being pulled into the role of the mad or manic is the player instead presented as the one sane individual in a land of the mad. Here it is worth noting that the act of any open world rpg character, can in no way be described as sane or normal for that matter, but that is a discussion for another time.
What is interesting is that, despite the player being given this label of sanity, do you still turn into the god of madness at the end. Despite your status as an outsider, are you quite forcefully pressed into the role of not only leading the game’s idea of madness, but to fully embody it. While the Elder scrolls series takes a lighter and more shallow approach to mental health and mental health struggles, is it still worthy to take up as an example here. One of the reasons being the more traditional and shallow approach that the work takes.
Conclusions
The biggest differences, besides tone and depth, is the player characters’ relationship to the other in the form of the mad. Elder scrolls series, and many other media forms presents the player as a spectator or outside observer to mad or divergent, even after becoming the Mad god, you are never truly a part of it. Playing a Malkavian on the other hand, forces you into the mind of the other, you become the mad, you become the other. Few pieces of media have, in my opinion, managed to toe the line of forcing the reader into the mindspace of the other and the divergent, without needing to resort to images of illusions and hallucinations.
The madness of Elder scrolls is loud and external, and something you encounter and interact with. The madness of Malkov is often silent, internal, and something you have to face and either accept and internalize, or fight and suppress.
Blog update 5th Januari 2023
It always feels strange to write a new number for the year, but here we are, in 2023. I must thank all of you that have stayed with me through the last year, and I hope that you will continue to do so throughout the coming year as well!
Here you can find the years first premium blog (only one day late!)
https://ko-fi.com/post/MMO-pets-Weird-but-wholesome-P5P3H1FC2
Please consider supporting me via either platform if you enjoy my writing, it means the world to me!
Blog update: 21th December
As promised, we are back in action in time for the holidays! With a distinctly, non christmassy blog post, I hope this is ok! Instead I give some writing suggestions on how you can bring your fantasy setting to life, using food!
Happy holidays everyone!
https://ko-fi.com/post/Food-drinks-and-what-they-can-say-about-your-fant-T6T6H6MQF
Media literacy 101, part 3, Protagonsits, antagonists and point of view
The roles of protagonists and antagonists are to drive a narrative forward. The distinction of protagonist and antagonist has been used to describe and define the main characters since ancient times. Today I will discuss how these two terms function and how it can help you analyze and enjoy fiction more deeply.
By analyzing the expected point of view can we learn more about the underlying themes that the text is presenting, as well as how these themes are supposed to be interpreted
Protagonist
The protagonist or protagonists are primarily defined by the character that is trying to achieve something or pull the narrative forward. The most simple example of this is the hero that works towards saving the words from destruction. In other words, the protagonist is someone that is working towards something.
Protagonists are often heroes or in other ways morally good and often represent the “good guys”. This is not always the the case. Here is where the term anti hero, or anti villain is copied. The anti hero often refers to a character that while acting immorally or evilly is still working towards a goal that would often be described as heroic or good. For example the violent vigenlantie the Punisher. Anti villains are similar characters that while often acting sympathetic and or morally good way, still often aim towards things that are considered villains.
The protagonist is also the primary point of view character in most fiction and are as a result often the point of view character for the audience. As a result it is quite common for the viewers to be expected to take the protagonists point of view, and to root for them. Here is where I once again reiterate that the protagonist is not necessarily either a hero, or morally just. To bring up an example that most of my viewers are familiar with is the Imperium of mankind from the warhammer 40k series often posed as the protagonist of many of the settings stories, and as I have discussed earlier, are far from what one would call heroes of the setting.
Warhammer in general is interesting since the primary protagonist often changes depending on the text, and while the Imperium of Mankind is often the chief protagonist, is this far from always the case? The codexes, books that describe how to play each faction in the tabletop game, is a prime example of having protagonists that are not part of the Imperium of mankind.
Antagonist
The antagonist is the protagonist opposite, and someone that is trying to stop the narrative from proceeding, often in the form of an adversary to the protagonist. For example, would Sauron be the antagonist of Lord of the Ring, as he is trying to stop the protagonist Frodo from destroying the ring and saving Middle earth.
The antagonist is often the villain or in other ways a character, entity or set of characters that represents the wrong side. This is far from always the case, and in most cases the antagonists are simply someone that is on the opposite side of the protagonist. A good example of these would be a romantic rival to the protagonist, or a general on the other side of a war where both sides are equally right or wrong.
The antagonist is as a result more difficult, but they can be thought of as the forces that, if it would win, would end the story. At the same time the antagonist drives the narrative forward much in the same way as the protagonist does, and are as a result vital to many narratives.
Furthermore, does the antagonist not need to be a character at all, the antagonist in many disaster oriented survival stories for example, have the environment take on the role of the primary antagonist. While these stories often have secondary antagonists, the primary obstacle is often storms, earthquakes or a virulent disease. The antagonist can, in this way, be the primary obstacle that the protagonist needs to overcome.
Another prominent quality of the antagonist is that they rarely, if ever have the role as point of view character for the audience. The antagonist is always seen through the eyes of the protagonist, and rarely has their point of view shown. If a villainous character is presented from their point of view, are they most likely a protagonist with morally evil intentions, rather than an antagonist.
Conclusions
Both the protagonist and antagonists are needed for the drive of most narratives, while they are not always needed are they incredibly common in all narratives that revolve around a central conflict. The protagonist can be said to lead the conflict forward, the one that sets out on the adventure, tries to save their home town from destruction or tries to marry their childhood love. The antagonist is likewise the force that tries to stop this goal to be achieved, be it a dragon at the end of the adventure, an evil oil company, or a romantic rival.
The protagonist is also the point of view character, and often the surrogate for the viewer in the narrative itself. This role as audience surrogate is played, regardless if the protagonist is sympathetic to the audience or not. For example, the protagonist in American Psycho is a truly detestable and horrifying human, but the audience are still forced to see the world through his eyes, because of his role as protagonist.
Understanding why a certain character acts as the narrative’s protagonist can help us as readers to understand what the text is trying to achieve. By presenting the viewers with a clear point of view does the text create an implicit line between what the audience can come to understand the primary conflict of the text, as well as how it can, or can not come to be solved. Even with texts like Warhammer 40k, and American Psycho that have highly unlikable protagonists, are they not chosen at random. TheImperium is often used to discuss themes of evil to fight bigger evils, and American psycho asks the audience if Patrick Bateman or the system that allows him to flourish is the true monster.
Blog update 7th December
Another premium blog is up for your personal at kofi and pateron! This is another text discussing one of my long time obsessions, Fallen London. This topic of this post is once again chosen by one of my Twitch viewers.
https://ko-fi.com/post/Queering-Fallen-London-S6S2GNOIB
In other news, I recently started a new library job, though it will not take off fully until next spring, so hopefully I will be able to get a nice backlog ready until then!